This is my first post on the blog. Today was Janet's big move up to in-patient physical therapy. She is anxious to return to California, but a lot of therapy will be necessary to prepare her. She will receive various therapies three hours a day, but I don't know how she will handle this considering she can only sit on the edge of her bed or in a wheelchair for about 10 minutes.
Jill, Amy, and I are currently staying with her 24 hours a day, but we cannot do this much longer and are considering alternatives. Thank you all for your E-mails, phone calls, gifts, and cards; these raise our spirits as well as Janet's.
Love,
Brian
8 comments:
Hiya Brian, Amy and Jill,
Hang in there! Consider yourselves hugged. Hopefully once you get Janet home to CA in a few weeks, Brian, you will be able to get some in-home help for a while. Many times people improve quicker once in their home environment. It will still be a long, slow process I'm sure with all of her injuries.
You are all in our thoughts and prayers every minute. God Bless, Love, Linda R.
Brian:
Good for you--your first blog. Jill and Amy have done a fabulous job keeping us all updated. Glad to see you have joined the group and look forward to seeing more from you. We realize, however, that this is the tough part and that improvements are going to be hard won and small at first. They will, however, be met with great celebration.
Remember when you were doing the self-study at NOVA and Janet made you a star chart? Remember when she called me twice a week and rewarded every five pages of my master's thesis with a "shopping and cookie" event? Though Janet's situation is much more serious, I will be thinking of a way to give her the encouragement she needs to last the course and succeed. Remember, we are with you in spirit and will be with you in person in about a week.
I wish I had some funny stories for you but all I have is that Bob is home safe and sound from Montreal--he enjoyed eating there which is about the extent of his sightseeing when he is working. Sadly, his French did not improve.
See you in a week!
Love
Vickie
Brian:
Good for you--your first blog. Jill and Amy have done a fabulous job keeping us all updated. Glad to see you have joined the group and look forward to seeing more from you. We realize, however, that this is the tough part and that improvements are going to be hard won and small at first. They will, however, be met with great celebration.
Remember when you were doing the self-study at NOVA and Janet made you a star chart? Remember when she called me twice a week and rewarded every five pages of my master's thesis with a "shopping and cookie" event? Though Janet's situation is much more serious, I will be thinking of a way to give her the encouragement she needs to last the course and succeed. Remember, we are with you in spirit and will be with you in person in about a week.
I wish I had some funny stories for you but all I have is that Bob is home safe and sound from Montreal--he enjoyed eating there which is about the extent of his sightseeing when he is working. Sadly, his French did not improve.
See you in a week!
Love
Vickie
It was so wonderful to hear your voice, Janet. Your sense of humor has obviously survived in tact and for it to appear in these awful circumstances is a tribute to your fortitude. I am honored to have you as a friend. Having had panic attacks myself, I know that you have to develop your own coping mechanism to lessen their effects. This takes time and a lot of trial-and-error problem solving.
Also, and this goes for all of you, be demanding. If you are not sleeping, keep nagging for something. With everything that is out there, there is bound to be something that won't interact badly with all the other stuff you are taking, Janet. As a matter of absolute fact - YOU ALL need to sleep. This is one of nature's best healers for both emotional and physical trauma. If you guys drop from exhaustion, you won't be able to help Janet at all. Janet will understand if you take a night off. Maybe not right now but later.
Love love love to all of you.
I meant that Janet might not understand now but she would later. I are a writer.
Brian, Jill and Amy,
So good to hear from Brian. You guys are all the greatest.
A wise woman told me this when I was caring for Mother her last months:
Every time you do something good for someone whether it be letting a car in front of you or sitting by the bedside of a loved one, you are taking a jelly bean out of your jelly bean jar. Every time you do something for yourself, that you enjoy or that brings you happiness, you put a jelly bean into the jar. The key is remembering to keep jelly beans in your jar so that you have them to give out when others need you.
Keeping this idea in my head saved me and I hope the visual will help you. Take a walk or hike, go on a picnic, get a massage, sit in the sun and read a book. Do whatever it takes to take you "away" for a time and put some jelly beans back in your jar. I am sure everyone of you has an empty jar right now.
Please take care of the care takers. I hope you find other options for getting away from 24/7 duties. Janet needs you for the long haul.
Love Zoe Lynda and Bill
Brian,
We know it is difficult to put yourselves first, but you all need TLC...and sleep. Then, you will have more physical and emotional energy for the journey ahead.
Your black and white heart-rock is on our coffee table; I hold it and send loving thoughts to your courageous family.
Does Janet have a CD or tape recorder for audio books with her? We would like to send some "distractions."
Fondly,
Sara and Robert
Hi Brian, Janet, Jill, and Amy,
I'm so glad to read a post from Brian and know that you guys are still hanging in there. You are an amazing family in many ways, and I know because you are going through this together, your family will be stronger at the other end. I'm glad Janet is making daily progress. When you're sleep deprived or in pain, it doesn't feel like the progress is as great as it really is. But I'm amazed at what she is doing so soon after such major surgeries. I was a wimp compared to her, and all I needed was knee surgery.
All of you, please remember to take care of yourselves. One of Joshua's favorite sayings is "Resting allows you to go the distance." It seems that typical American society doesn't agree with that statement, but I agree with it more and more as life goes on. One of the biggest battles my acupuncturist has with me and my allergies is that I run out before she's got me stable, then I contact allergens, and each reaction is a little bit worse than the one before it. I've now gone 11 days without having to use my inhaler and Benadryl, and the acupuncturist told me yesterday, "You've turned a corner, but you're not stable. If you contact someone wearing a perfurme that you're allergic to, you will set yourself back to worse than you were before. If you go out, please avoid places with lots of people, and when you are not out, please stay by your air purifiers. You still have two or three more steps in the total healing process. If you don't go through them, you'll never be completely better." When I was in Taiwan an herbalist told me that I needed to learn to embrace my bad knees, and my body would find an equilibrium at which I could still function. My "embracing" the problem consisted of ignoring it and going on with life as if nothing had happened. The acupuncturist now says, that that is the root of many of my health problems today. "Embracing" a health problem is a kind of "zen" concept, and I do it better when I'm thinking in Chinese, but I did it like this: when my allergies got so bad in April that I couldn't go to Aunt Laura's funeral (which I really wanted to attend), I realized that I needed to make a big change in my lifestyle. My first step was accepting that I have allergies and that I have to relearn how to live in order to deal with them. After I accepted them, I actually began to improve, and my mood certainly got better. I know this can't compare with your situation entirely, but I offer it as something that has been helpful to me in dealing with health issues.
I pray for you all every day. I hope you have the strength to get through all the challenges that you are facing. If there is anything more that we can do, feel free to ask.
Love, Teresa Liu
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